The Cost Of Holding On

Letting go is an act of courage and strength. It’s about releasing the things that no longer serve us, making room for growth and moving forward with purpose. This journey of release is not just about saying goodbye; it’s about opening up to new possibilities and embracing change.

Years ago I used to cling to the familiar, even when it hurt me. I held on to a high school relationship that was abusive because that was what was in store. I used to believe that persistence would eventually lead to happiness. But this relationship cast a shadow over my younger years, a time meant for exploration and self-discovery, which became a constant struggle for me.

Years later, as a dedicated teacher, mother and wife, I faced a similar challenge. My passion was undeniable, but the profession’s demands often kept me away from precious moments with my family. I missed first steps, school plays, and quiet evenings with my husband and kids—all irreplaceable experiences that make up the tapestry of life.

Sad woman on a window

It took time, but I learned that letting go isn’t about loss; it’s about finding freedom. By releasing the grip on the past, I found space to be present with my daughters, to nurture my marriage and to rediscover myself.

I want to share some of the lessons I learned so you don’t have to go it alone:

  • Recognize the Signs: Pay attention to feelings of discomfort, stagnancy or unhappiness. They are very clear indicators that something needs to change, and yes, you may find those feelings comfortable enough compared to the anxiety you may feel for the unknown but trust me, you need to be honest with yourself to get a better view of the picture. 

  • Seek Support: Reach out to friends, family or professionals who can offer perspective and guidance. There are many different types of professionals that can help (I am one of those) and if one is not the best fit for you, don’t stop the search. You’ll eventually find it! 

  • Embrace Change: Understand that change is a natural part of life and an opportunity for growth.

  • Prioritize Self-Care: Take care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. It’s the foundation for making sound decisions–I have a lot of posts on self-care and worth that you can check! 

  • Set Boundaries: Know your limits and learn how to communicate them clearly in your relationships and career.

  • Cultivate Mindfulness: Practice being in the moment. It helps in recognizing what truly matters. There are many different ways to practice mindfulness, some are more passive, others more energetic, I’m sure there’s one for you!

  • Explore New Passions: Letting go of the old makes room for new interests and hobbies that can bring joy and fulfillment, and a ‘new life’ will require new, healthier passions.

  • Reflect on Values: First learn to recognize your values, then align your actions with those core values. It’s the compass that guides you to what’s truly important.

  • Forgive Yourself: Release self-blame and learn from past experiences instead of dwelling on them. This will be hard, I know it for a fact, but it is possible and it’s totally worth it. 

  • Take Action: Make the conscious decision to let go and follow through with actions that support that choice. Block whoever you need to block, leave the negative workplace, end the relationship. Be bold in your self-care!

Letting go is not a one-time event; it’s a process that requires patience and perseverance. It’s about learning to release not just people or careers, but also old versions of ourselves. In doing so, we make way for new experiences that shape us into the people we aspire to be.

I was the woman in this story and letting go was the key to unlocking a life filled with love, presence, and personal fulfillment, but it could be you or any other woman you know, and I want to help you recognize the signs and make a switch before any more time passes by.

As you embark on your own journey of letting go, remember that it’s a path to liberation. It’s about saying yes to life and all the beauty it has to offer. Embrace it, and watch as your world expands in the most extraordinary ways!

I am Kim Keane, holistic life coach, and I want to help you along the way. Click here to discover how! 

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Embracing the Lessons of Our Past: How Pain Shapes Our Growth

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Meeting Emotional Needs: From Unhealthy Patterns to Self-Validation