What No One Told You About Emotionally Preparing Yourself for Healing Childhood Trauma
Today, we're diving into a deeply significant and challenging topic: how to emotionally prepare yourself before you begin healing your childhood trauma. If you’re reading this, you’ve likely recognized that your past is impacting your present, and you’re ready to address it–that’s a monumental step, congratulations! But what’s the next step? Let’s unpack this head-on without sugarcoating anything.
First things first, this healing journey is no quick fix but will improve the rest of your life. It’s a process, and yeah, it can get pretty messy and complicated. You’ve probably been dodging some feelings for a while now, maybe even years, and facing them isn’t easy, but it’s super important.
The only way to get through it is to dive right in!
I’ve got some major tips to help you navigate this bumpy road. But hey, that doesn’t mean you need to follow them in a strict order or that there won't be more stuff to consider. As a coach—and someone who’s been through childhood trauma—I just know these steps are game-changers. They’ll take your experience from feeling super heavy and confusing to something way more manageable.
Grounding Yourself
Grounding yourself is pivotal. Throughout your healing journey, there will be moments when you feel like a ticking time bomb, ready to explode. This can induce a fluttery feeling, akin to an out-of-body experience. To navigate this, it’s essential to anchor yourself in the present. Grounding techniques, whether during your sessions or afterward, can make a world of difference. Deep breathing is particularly effective. Trauma often causes us to breathe shallowly, leading to dizziness or headaches. Focused deep breathing, feeling your feet on the ground, or taking a walk can help you stay rooted in the moment. Ensure you feel safe now, before revisiting old wounds.
Setting Clear Intentions
You’ll have to go back and forth a couple of times, and I promise you it’s not about reliving painful moments; it’s about understanding why you want to embark on this journey. Knowing your end goal can provide the motivation needed to persevere and the compassion required to avoid getting tied into a blame game, even when unexpected emotions and memories surface. Remember that the journey evolves and becomes less consuming over time, but it never fully ends. Keeping the person you want to become in mind, or even the full reality you want to live in, will help you navigate the tough times with more ease.
If you don’t know the stages of healing childhood trauma, I tell you here.
Building a Support System
A robust support system is crucial. Healing alone is possible but isn’t advisable. During my own therapy journey, I felt isolated, angry and embarrassed, which only exacerbated my struggles. Having trusted people to turn to when times get tough or when you want to share something about your journey, can make a significant difference. Create a list of supportive individuals around you and let them know you might need their help. Be proactive and specify what would be helpful for you when you're overwhelmed–you might need some prior self-discovery to know this. Some people might not feel comfortable supporting you–and that’s ok– so it's essential to identify those who can genuinely assist and understand your needs. You don’t need many, just a few trusted and loved ones.
Practicing Self-Compassion
Being kind to yourself is easier said than done, I reeeally know it, but it’s essential. During your healing journey, you’ll encounter a multitude of emotions, including anger, sadness, guilt, and resentment. These feelings, though heavy, are also a means to reclaim control. Remember that you were a child or young adult when the trauma occurred, and it was beyond your control. Don’t blame yourself (or others, but that’s a conversation for another time). Instead, use these emotions to propel you forward, recognizing that you did the best you could with the tools and skills you had at the time.
Healing is a marathon, not a sprint. There's no prize for rushing through it, however, you can accelerate it a bit. I really suggest you start small and gradually tackle the bigger stuff. Trying to handle everything all at once can lead to burnout. Embrace the "slow and steady wins the race" mindset and let yourself move through the process naturally. This approach will keep you going, even when it’s tough, and help you build patience with yourself.
As you embark on this journey, remember that you’ve got this. It’s a challenging path, but I believe in you wholeheartedly. If you found this guide helpful, please share it with a friend who might need it too, or who you think could be your supporter through this, so they’re a bit more informed and know what to expect. Together, we can navigate the complexities of healing and move towards a brighter, more empowered future.
I’m Kim Keane, coach and energy healer, and I’d love to help you transform your life, your relationships and ultimately build a path toward a loving, peaceful life. DM me or email me at kim@kimkeane.com if you want to get personalized support, download my Free Everyday Spirituality Handbook or get my EFT Tapping Booster Session to continue making progress on your healing journey!